BUT AM I ACTUALLY AN ADULT?

I've been an "adult" for quite some time now. In fact, a coworker recently pointed out that I graduated High School 5 years ago.. hold up! 5? Like the number of fingers I have on one hand.. yeah I almost hit the floor. Either way, I've been moved out since I was 17, spending a few of those years living with a guy. Now that I am back on my own I am confused as to who thought it would be a good idea to let me live alone.

I stayed at a friends house the other night and came home to find my straightener still on with a burnt hair elastic touching it. Mind you I did my hair before work.. came home from work changed clothes and left.. my straightener was on for 24 hours and somehow didn't catch my house on fire via hair band. 

I've also been caught three times (thank god someone was coming over) leaving my keys in the door. Apparently after I set my purse down I close the door without taking my keys out.. I might as well be shouting "Come take what you want" throughout the neighborhood.

I'm completely incapable of working a thermostat.. I'm either hot or cold never just right. All my life my Dad told me not to touch it, so when I lived with someone else I let them control it. I didn't realize that one day it would leave me sweating in the dead of winter. 

I can never remember to put my trash can out on the right day either.. grated one person doesn't create that much trash but after three weeks the stuff starts to over-flow the trash can outside. 

Not to mention I keep forgetting I have really close neighbors (we share a wall) and I am pretty sure they will vouch for the fact that I have no musical talent at all.

It's honestly a wonder that Roxy and I are still alive. Lesson being just because you can pay your rent doesn't mean you are responsible enough to take the trash out or not burn your house to the ground. Someone come live with me and continue to enable my bad habits.